Leigh Kelly

My built in best friend and sister, Kate, and I posing as our mom took a photo of us.

“What will you do when I go to college?” 

It was supposed to be a simple question. Something that I’ve never had to think about until now. Suddenly we’re all grown up, no longer fighting over who gets to pick the next show or who gets to sit shotgun in the car. The question is now a harsh reminder that once my sister goes off to college, it won’t feel the same at home.

Being the youngest sibling, I’ve looked up to my older sisters my whole life, our oldest sister being our role model. Days that once consisted of arguing about stupid things like who took each other’s shirt or why the other is taking so long to get ready in the bathroom, quickly turned into conversations about dorms, meal plans, and classes for next year. Soon those conversations became a reality of buying college merch and celebrating where her new home will be for the next four years, knowing there will be a more quiet, empty version of ours.

The hardest part is that our everyday lives will change. Living with each other means hanging out whenever we want, but soon it will be, “When are you coming back for break?” Suddenly, the idea of waiting until Thanksgiving or Christmas to see the person I have lived with my whole life feels hard to grasp.

Our rooms once across the hall from each other are now a 22 mile drive away. We will no longer be able to barge into each other’s rooms to talk or fight about the little things. Those fights that once felt like the end of the world are now something that I will miss about our sisterly bond.

Now as graduation is creeping up, it’s hitting me all at once. Time moves faster when change is coming. Soon her room, with all of our memories, will be packed up in boxes. She will meet new people and start new beginnings, but a part of me wishes I didn’t have to stay behind.